How I Convinced My Family To Trade Gifts for Trips

Growing up, I loved Christmas. We didn't have much, so the holidays were all about traditions like baking cookies, exchanging small gifts and spending time with family. But as I got older and started celebrating with my husband and our two daughters, the retail frenzy got harder to resist. I bought into the shopping mania and in no time, Christmas at our house started to go hand in hand with gift giving.

By the time December 25 rolled around each year, I was one of those exhausted and frazzled parents, stunned at how much money had been spent. It’s a feeling that does not make for a happy holiday. Several years ago, I decided I’d had enough of the excessive shopping and decided I’d rather spend our money on family holiday destinations versus the trendiest toys or gadgets. It's not an easy pattern to break, but as a family, we were able to make a commitment to spending time together rather than spending money on a seemingly endless tower of perfectly wrapped presents. Here’s how we made the transition.

1. When Enough is Enough

I reached a point where just thinking about the number of gifts my girls would receive from our extended family and us caused a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I knew they had too much. Our playroom was overflowing, and there was little they actually needed. I didn't like how consumerism had transformed our Christmas tradition.

2. Call for Backup

For the few years before I officially pulled the plug on the bonanza of presents, we’d taken a family vacation right after the holidays. Looking back, I realized I enjoyed those trips far more than our actual Christmas celebration. At that moment, I started formulating a plan to cut way back on gifts so we could travel more as a family. But I knew I’d have to convince my husband first. He agreed—reluctantly at first, to be quite honest—and we decided to cut back on gift giving that Christmas.

3. Don't Outlaw All Gifts

To preserve the magic of Christmas morning, we decided to keep stockings for the girls that Santa would fill. (We had always emphasized that Santa only brought small gifts, so transitioning to just a stocking was easy.)

In the weeks leading up to Christmas, instead of shopping till we dropped, my husband and I secretly planned our annual trip. On Christmas morning, the girls unwrapped numbered boxes that contained clues about where we were headed. As our destination became more obvious with each clue, the thrill of discovering that we’d be leaving for Chicago in just three days was far more exciting for them than receiving another toy. And ever since, unwrapping boxes of clues has become the most anticipated part of Christmas Day.

4. Invest in Memories

The first year we decided to cut back on gift giving, my daughters were 12 and 5. They are now much older, and gifting ourselves a trip has become a well-established family tradition.

Over the years, our family holiday destinations have included Walt Disney World, Caribbean islands, snowy Quebec hideaways and fabulous city pilgrimages to San Diego, New York and San Francisco. And as my oldest daughter begins to have her own life outside our immediate family, I know our time of holiday family trips may be coming to an end. So I'm treasuring each one, and find myself increasingly thankful that we chose to invest in memories that we’ll each carry with us no matter where the holidays take us.

Written by Lisa Goodmurphy